Have you ever slept on a convertible sofa? I think my grandmother referred to them as the hide a bed. We used to own one. They are not comfortable. I'd always seem to find the middle bar no matter where I slept on the mattress. This metal bar would dig into my back or my hip and I'd get up in the morning all stiff and sore.
That same feeling happens to me every once in a while when I've found myself struggling with the metal bar of another uncomfortable moment of diet mentality. You know the one where you've had some momentum in your non-diet approach to weight-loss, the scale hasn't budged in a while and your wonderful brain offers you suggestions about trying the latest fad diet that has run across your Facebook feed.
Stop!!! Slow Down! Take a moment to take in a deep breath and relax.
Did you know that what your brain offers you in the way of sentences are just thoughts that you CAN choose not to think? I don't mean taking a look at the blue sky and dismissing the thoughts because maybe that sky is orange, no, wow look at that blue sky, it's so amazing! We all know that truth about a blue sky, it's blue. I'm talking about the thoughts we have bouncing around in our heads that are not truthful. Thoughts like....the scale is stuck, there must be something wrong with me.
Thoughts like....I'll never be able to lose weight without going on a restrictive diet, my body is broken.
Thoughts like....other people can lose weight so easy but I was just born to struggle to lose weight.
A convertible sofa is not comfortable and neither are these horrible thoughts you keep choosing. A coach friend of mine calls them Indulgent Thoughts....they may seem like a really good idea but lead to indulgent feelings that cause what I like to call the infinity loop of toilet swirling. Because no one wants to admit they choose to stick their heads in the toilet bowl of poor thinking.
Instead of the thoughts from above, why not slow down and ask yourself some really great questions?
My favorite one....it this true?
Is it true that there is something wrong with you when the scale hasn't moved? It's just a square little box sitting on the floor. It doesn't tell you anything more than the number displayed on the screen. It doesn't really tell you if you've had weightloss or fatloss or waterloss or muscle gain or if you just drank a gallon of water or......want me to keep going? It's just not a great measuring tool when there are so many others available to us.
Is it true that you'll never be able to lose weight without dieting? Well, have you tried it? How long have you tried? Have you tried it in a way that feels loving and kind and gentle and full of compassion for your mind and body and has allowed you to make peace with food? Did you even know that people can lose weight without dieting? Well it's true. You can. I've seen a lot of my clients lose weight without ever going on a diet ever again. (Hint: I teach an approach to weightloss that allows our unique God given design along with renewing thought work and some really cool lessons on how to feel a feeling instead of eating a bag of chips approach).
Now you are probably just getting annoyed with me as my questions sound like something from a three year old in the backseat on a long car ride. It feels a little worse than being stuck in a convertible mattress. But that is what we do when we think those diet trap thoughts after the indulgent ones. Look! That next fad diet is not going to change anything for our broken down selves, because we are not broken, our thoughts are. I know it's annoying to hear......so stop repeating the thought. I know it's just there! Like we have no control over it.
BUT WE DO!!!
Did you know that we can manage our thinking? We can actually decide what to think on purpose. Sorry, I'm probably still annoying...
What about taking a moment to just sit with your thoughts, acknowledge that maybe it feels like a truth in there, but it's probably just some lower back pain from that bar you've been pressing against all night. Why not take a moment to decide to think something else instead?
I love to take my "not so true" thoughts and tell myself something that is true, like I've lost weight before without being on a restrictive diet by learning how to really listen to my body. And you can too!
God created our hunger signals, and an amazing body which when allowed compassion and practice of some new skills will naturally release some weight. He also helps us to process our feelings when we spend time meditating on His word, talking to Him, or when we sit down with wise counsel and share our burdens. Prayer is a wonderful way to let go of that negative thinking that clutters up our mind and our heart.
Last nights supper, yeah that one was really good. And after dinner I was able to enjoy having a few bites of ice cream while visiting with friends in a relaxed and leisurely pace, AND BONUS, today my pants are getting loose. I think I just may be shrinking as I write this post. LOL, sometimes my humor cracks me up more than the person sitting next to me. Just don't take me on a car ride because I can get really punchy and ask a lot of questions but that's o.k. because I like my sassy attitude and dry sense of humor.
I've learned some tricks along the way that have nothing to do with shoving myself into a convertible bed and torturing myself with yet another diet that feels like a bar is digging into my lower back.
If you are curious as to how this non-dieting approach is possible for sustainable weightloss just send me a message and we can schedule on a zoom call or better yet, if you live close, just come on over for coffee, I'll let you sit in the comfy chair in my office and have a chat.
Girl, You've Got This!!
Coach Shel
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